Truth Be Told
by LuvnSVU
Summary: Olivia’s diary is stolen and someone is using it to reveal embarrassing aspects about her life. EO of course. Please read and review. COMPLETE
1. Chapter 1

TRUTH BE TOLD

Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. I just like to play with them.

Summary: Olivia's diary is stolen and someone is using it to reveal embarrassing aspects about her life. E/O of course

A/N: Please read and review

Olivia Benson's Apartment

Monday 19th September 6:17pm

Olivia looked around frustrated at the sight going on around her. CSU were going through her things. Though they were trying not to disturb her personal items too much Olivia still felt a twinge of violation settling in her stomach.

"Sorry Detective Benson, not long 'till were out of here." One of the tech guys smiled sympathetically. Olivia just nodded and wondered out of the room.

"Hey Liv! I came as fast as I could."

Olivia smiled in spite of what was going on around her as she looked at her partner who had just entered her apartment.

"Hey El."

"Someone's been in my apartment. I don't think anything's missing, but it looks like they were looking for something. And I don't even want to talk about what they left on my comforter" She smiled wearily.

"What they leave so I know what type of person we are dealing with here"

"Well, let's just say it's something only you men can deposit."

"Liv..."

"Don't say it, it still could be some random break and enter"

"What with all you stuff still left here, I don't think so. Are you sure nothings missing? Nothing personal to you?"

Olivia walked back into her bedroom Elliot following closely behind. The room looked fine, a little bit worked over. Elliot thought it was nothing that his partner couldn't have done herself in a rush to leave earlier this morning.

"So nothing's missing?" He asked fingers brushing lightly over her jewellery box.

"No, I'm telling you everything's here, nothing's really of value you anyway. It's only really sentimental things and my..."

Olivia stopped mid sentence as a thought crossed her mind. She quickly went across to her bedside table and opened the top draw. She looked in here before but she couldn't be sure if she had seen it. She sucked in a deep breath as her eyes scanned the draw. It was gone.

"Shit" she said softly.

Elliot turned to her and saw the expression on his partner's face. He quickly moved to her side.

"Something's missing. What is it?"

She blushed slightly. This was a little bit embarrassing for her. She reasoned with herself that it was no big deal and that millions of women kept one. But Olivia liked to think of herself as different to most women. Not one that would indulge in such a vice.

"He took my umm...diary" Olivia looked up at Elliot who had almost a relieved expression on his face.

"Phew, is that all. When I saw you going for that top draw I was sure we were going to be searching for something of the mechanical kind" He laughed wiggling his eyebrows.

"This isn't funny Elliot." She huffed. Her mind started drifting over all the things that were in her diary, each remembrance more embarrassing then the last.

"Oh my God, Elliot. I _need_that diary back. You have no idea how bad it will be if certain people read it." She moaned.

Elliot watched his partner in fascination. How bad could her diary be? She seemed to live a quiet life as far as he could tell. Not out raving to all hours of the night. At worst it may contain details of her working life and the horrors that she saw.

An hour later the tech guys all had left leaving Olivia and Elliot alone. Olivia had been a little quiet since the realization of the missing diary. Her mind spinning out of control of all the people she did not want to see get a hold of her diary. _IAB, Don Cragen, __Casey,__ Ellio__t_ to name a few But mostly Elliot, she would be mortified if he ever knew what she had written about.

"Are you staying here tonight?" Elliot asked, snapping her out of her thoughts.

"No, I'm just going to spend the night in the crib. I'm going to need a whole new bed." She said scrunching up her nose at the thought of some strange man on her bed.

"Maybe you should come back to my place" he spoke softly. He knew what her answer would be but he had to make the offer.

Olivia snorted. "Oh yeah sure. Kathy would just love that, right?"

Every since he moved back home Elliot and Olivia had seemed to come to a silent agreement about the amount of time they spent together. Olivia knew she was a target of Kathy's rage more than once in their marriage and since Elliot had decided to give his marriage another ago Olivia felt like she had no choice but to pull back from their thing. She didn't even know what their thing was. It was more than a partnership and more than friends, but it had no clear definition.

"Yeah, might not be such a good idea to bring you home. She was kinda shitty when I left to come here tonight in the middle of dinner."

Her big brown eyes looked into his sea blue ones. She squeezed his arm. "Thanks for coming tonight. I'm sorry if I got you in trouble." She smiled a sad small smile. How the Hell did they end up like this?

"No problem partner. Call me if you want to talk or you just get lonely in the crib." He kissed the top of her head as he walked out the door.

SVU Squad Room

Tuesday 20th September 9:15 am

The squad room was quiet as the detectives went silently about their work. Quiet times were cherished and used as a way to catch up on paper work. Olivia was sitting at her desk going through her papers when she was interrupted by the sound of her cell phone. She looked at the screen but did not recognize the number.

"Benson."

Elliot watched as his partner took the call. He was surprised to see her look up at him and quickly move her way to the back corner of the squad room. He watched trying to determine his partner's facial expressions as she took the call. She shook her head frustrated and ran a hand through her hair.

Elliot tried to look busy as she came back over. He watched her from his lowered eyes as she nervously flicked her nails against each other. Finally he couldn't take it anymore.

"What's going on Liv?"

She looked in his eyes trying to judge on whether or not to tell him. She wanted to tell him, she needed to talk to someone about it but she didn't know if Elliot was the right someone. She decided to take the plunge. He was her best friend after all.

"That was this guy Declan, a journalist, from the Manhattan News. He received a fax this morning. It was an excerpt from my diary."

"What? Why would someone steal your diary and send bit's of it over to a journalist."

Olivia shrugged though she had a fair good idea why it went to Declan.

"Well let's get over there."

Manhattan News

10:21am

The ride over had been fairly silent. Olivia debated on whether or not to tell Elliot exactly how she knew Declan. In the end she decided to keep quiet hoping that there was still a way that she could get away with meeting with Declan and not having Elliot know about them.

"Olivia!" Declan called out when he saw her walking toward him through a row of occupied cubicles.

Olivia smiled a genuine smile. She liked Declan, thinking back she couldn't quiet remember why they had ended things.

Elliot felt himself tense up as he watched his partner hug this man. Elliot looked him up and down. I could take him, he thought.

"Elliot, this is Declan, an old friend. Declan, Elliot my partner"

The two men shook hands sizing each other up. This did not go unnoticed by Olivia and she suddenly realized there was a good chance of not getting out of here without explaining how well she new Declan. She had to act fast.

"So hey, can I see what was sent to you?" She said a little too quickly. Declan reached across to his desk and picked up a piece of paper. Olivia's eyes scanned to sheet in her hand and shook her head. She handed the piece of paper to Elliot to let him read for himself.

It was Olivia's thoughts about how a case went down and how in her opinion the NYPD screwed up resulting in letting a killer walk free.

"He wanted you to print that?" She asked angrily

"Yeah, in my column tomorrow. Hey look, don't worry. As far as I'm concerned it doesn't exist. You can take it"

She smiled gratefully at Declan who reached across and squeezed her hand. None of which was lost on Elliot.

"Why would he send this to you?" He asked suspiciously.

"Maybe he thought I would print it considering...Olivia's and my history"

Olivia groaned inwardly. Here we go, she thought

"Was he mentioned in your diary?" Elliot turned to look Olivia in the eye.

"Yeah he was."

"So maybe whoever took your diary was thinking an old...lover would print this" Elliot concluded. He hated to think of Olivia with this guy, not that there was anything wrong with him; Elliot just did not like the thought of his partner with any man. He would not let his mind delve into the reasons why he did not want her with anyone, but he was pretty sure he knew.

They were headed back to the precinct in silence. Olivia had not said much since they left Declan, with him promising to call if he received anymore faxes from Olivia's diary

"Are you Ok?" Elliot placed a hand on Olivia's knee to get her attention.

Olivia glanced down at Elliot's hand resting softly on her knee. She could feel the heat radiating from his touch sending shivers down her spine. God how she wished she could have those hands all over her body. She shook her head to concentrate on what Elliot was saying.

"Huh?"

"I asked if you were ok" He smiled to himself. He knew she was distracted by his hand on her but he was enjoying the feel of her too much to remove it.

"Yeah I guess. It's just that those are my private thoughts Elliot. Someone is reading my most private thoughts and probably having a good laugh." She huffed.

"Hey look. It won't get printed tomorrow. So maybe this guy will just give up. Throw your diary in some dumpster never to be seen of again. Ok?"

She nodded her head in agreement. "Let's hope so."


	2. Chapter 2

TRUTH BE TOLD

Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. I just like to play with them.

Summary: Olivia's diary is stolen and someone is using it to reveal embarrassing aspects about her life. E/O of course

A/N: Please read and review

SVU Squad Room

Wednesday 21st September

11:33 am

Olivia was feeling pretty good. No calls about extracts about her diary had been received and she was beginning to believe that Elliot had been right. She looked around and smiled in satisfaction. Things were getting back to normal. She had even gone out and bought herself a new bed yesterday afternoon and was quiet happy with the sleep she got last night.

"Everybody listen up. I want full reports on where you are all at on any cases by the time you leave here tonight. Now get to work." Captain Don Cragen barked his order standing in the middle of the room using a large yellow envelope in his hand to stress his point. The detectives nodded their understanding and busied themselves in their work.

Cragen smiled at the flurry he had just created. He was fond of his detectives, them being such a small unit really made them work well together. He looked at the envelope in his hand which had his name scrawled across it in messy writing. He tore open the envelope removing what was in it. He gasped and quickly placed it against his chest.

"Cap, you OK?" Fin asked coming over to the elder man.

Cragens cheeks turned cherry red. "F.. f.. fine" He stuttered.

Fin watched concerned as the Captain walked over to stand behind Olivia's chair. He placed a hand on her shoulder to get her attention.

"Hey, what's up?" Olivia smiled at him. Though the two would never admit it they had a Father Daughter relationship. Cragen was very fond of Olivia and found himself more times than he liked to admit going to bat for her against IAB.

"I need to see you in my office now" He answered softly still clutching the mysterious envelope and what it contained against his chest.

Elliot looked up quickly. He noticed the tone straight away in his Boss's voice. It was a tone he used on vics. His tone also wasn't lost on Olivia she glanced nervously at Elliot and stood up to follow him to his office.

"Take a seat Liv" Cragen said walking around to his side of the desk. Olivia had been called in here enough times to know that a conversation with her boss that started with 'take a seat' wasn't good. She wordlessly sat down in the chair nearest to her. She licked her lips nervously as she waited for him to start talking.

"I just received this," he started patting the envelope laying face down on his desk, "and all I'm going to say is that I didn't look. Well not long. And we are going to figure out what the Hell is going on." Olivia looked at her captain shaking her head in confusion. He wasn't making any sense, and why did it look like he was embarrassed.

"What the Hell are you talking about?" She demanded, she was getting impatient. Cragen still had his hand over the envelope as if debating on whether or not to show her.

"Here." He said quietly.

He handed her what looked to be a photo picture side down. She frowned puzzled by this but reached across to take it from his hand. She flipped the photo and let out a loud gasp.

"Oh God" She put her head in her hands the photo still clutched tightly in her hand.

This was the most embarrassing moment of her life. She started to wish she would just die to end the humiliation. And to think Donald Cragen had seen this, he was like a father to her. This was something you definitely did not want your father to see.

She glanced back down at the photo in her hand. She shook her head silently wishing she could go back in time to when it was taken. If she could she would never be in _that_ position with _that_ guy.

She was studying the photo which was obviously taken with some telescopic lens. It was a moment in her life she wished she could take back. But by looking at it she clearly looked like she was enjoying the moment. She was on top, her head thrown back and her back arched with him sucking on one nipple. There was no doubting what was going on in that picture. The only consolation she had was that the mystery man's face was not visible as he had his head pressed firmly against her chest.

"I don't know what to say, I'm just so embarrassed." She muttered, not able to make eye contact.

"How long ago, eh, was that?"

"What? Why?"

"Well, I want to know how long this guy has been following you and if he's escalating"

Olivia rubbed her hands over face and tried to think. "Umm, maybe six months ago."

"Ok. I 'm calling in Haung to get a profile on this guy. I want answers." He stood abruptly signalling end of conversation.

"What? No, you can't, he's going to want to see this" Olivia said waving the photo in front of her.

"No way is anybody else seeing this." She crossed her arms over her chest in defiance.

"I'm sorry Liv, but this has become an SVU investigation. Look, I understand you're embarrassed but those guys out there are your friends. They won't pass judgment"

"Oh they won't?" She replied sarcastically.

Cragen walked over to the office door opening it for the four male detectives to come in. They had all been standing around curiously watching the captain's office since the two of them had walked in there. Elliot was the first to walk in and took a seat right next to his partner. She had her head back in her hands and shaking her head from side to side.

"Liv, you ok? What's happening talk to me?" Elliot leaned across concern etched in his words. He was starting to worry. This couldn't be good; she wouldn't even look him in the eye. He placed a reassuring hand on her back and started rubbing in slow circular motions.

Olivia could feel the tears pressing from behind her eyes. Why was he making this so hard? If he was just like Fin, Munch or Lake she could probably get away with a few laughs and some smart ass comments from the guys and then they would move on. But with Elliot she knew he was going to react like she had never seen before. He was going to see something he was not going to like. And it scared her to think that once he saw this photo of her he would think less of her, that she would no longer be perfect in his eyes. Even less if he found out who the guy was.

"I received something today that I believe is connected to Olivia's break in and the fax over at the Manhattan News." Cragen stood facing his small troop. His eyes drifted to Olivia who was yet to raise her eyes and still had the photo clutched in her hand. He considered for a moment that maybe this was not the best thing to do, exposing her in front of her colleagues, but he was starting to worry that whoever was doing this could escalate to physical harm. So he pressed on.

"Olivia is holding what I received. I want to hear no smart ass comments. I just want an investigation started and I wanted it done right. Olivia, if you could please just show them what you're holding"

Olivia still had her head down her breathing became irregular she tried to calm herself down. These men were her friend's, they had seen dozens of photos over the years of naked women. But none of me, she thought sadly. She looked up and saw Munch to her left. She decided to hand the photo to him first. She wanted to delay Elliot looking at it for as long as possible.

Munch took the photo from her hands. He let out a small gasp and quickly passed it on to Fin not letting his eyes linger for too long. Fin grabbed it and studied. "Damn baby girl" he said under his breath. Olivia threw her head back and glared at him. He mouthed a sorry at her and she gave him a small smile back to acknowledge his apology.

Lakes eyed swept quickly over the photo like he was looking for clues, satisfied that he could not see any he handed it over to Elliot.

The whole room took a collective breath in as Elliot took the photo. Olivia was sure she was going to have a heart attack her heart was thumping so hard in her chest. She had to look at his face; she had to see his reaction.

Elliot studied the photo. A surge of anger starting at his toes was slowly working its way up. He was stunned at what he was looking at. _His_partner with her head thrown back a look of ecstasy on her face. He was going to lose it. He could feel it starting to seep out of him. He had to get out of that office; the air in there had become incredible thin. And he was afraid of what he would say if she spoke to him.

He stood quickly causing the chair he had been sitting in to fall back slamming into the floor. He walked out his hands on his head in an attempt to keep from punching anything. Olivia followed quickly behind him. The four men left behind in the office let out breathes that had not known they were holding.

"Elliot. Wait. Please talk to me." She managed to catch up to him and turn him around just before he made it to the stairs that led to the crib.

"Who is he?" He demanded a look of venom in his eyes.

"Elliot no. I can't tell you that" she whispered.

"What you don't know who he is or you just won't tell me." He seethed glaring at her

"What are you trying to imply Elliot" She got into his face, anger now consuming her at the underlying allegation of his words.

"Well, you know what they say. If it looks like a duck and walk likes a duck..." He was stopped mid sentence by her hand that slapped him across his face leaving a stinging handprint.

"You bastard!"

When Olivia turned around she noticed the audience that had witnessed the entire scene. Shame covered her cheeks as she walked lifelessly back to her desk. Elliot turned around and continued up the stairs.

Fin walked over to Olivia and crouched down next to her. "Baby, we need to know who that guy is. You know it's routine." He soothingly patted her hand.

Olivia nodded. "I know. But I need to talk to someone first before I tell you."

She stood up and quickly walked out the door before she had a chance to change her mind.

Elliot paced back and forth on the roof going over the events that had just played out. He knew he was wrong to imply she was a slut but the hurt he was feeling at the thought of her in bed with another man was killing him. He shook his head in annoyance. He had no claim on her she could sleep with whoever she pleased and he was a married man which made his outburst all the more insane. It was time for him to be honest. With Olivia, with Kathy, but mostly with himself. He wanted her. He always had. He was just too scared to let her know. He had to tell her. He was going to tell her, right after he apologised. He just hoped that she would accept his apologies.


	3. Chapter 3

TRUTH BE TOLD

Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. I just like to play with them.

Summary: Olivia's diary is stolen and someone is using it to reveal embarrassing aspects about her life. E/O of course

A/N: Please read and review

ADA Casey Novak's Office

1:43 pm

"Hey, don't tell me we were having lunch and I forgot'' Casey smiled at Olivia as she walked into her office.

Olivia smiled faintly back not making eye contact with the blonde lawyer sitting in front of her.

"No we didn't have lunch plans, Case."

Casey studied her friend's face; she looked as if she was trying to hold back tears. This surprised Casey, Olivia was the strongest woman she knew. When Casey had first met her she had doubts that the two women would ever be able to get along, but over the years they had become quiet close.

"Liv, what's the matter?" Casey asked coming around the desk to stand in front of her friend.

"I have to tell you something. And you're not going to like it very much, but please if you could just hear me out" Olivia looked at her friend with pleading eyes. This was the moment Olivia had been dreading for the past three months. Their little secret was about to be revealed and Olivia had a feeling that she was the one about to cop most of the blame.

"I did something really, really, stupid six months ago. And I just want you to know that I am so sorry and that it meant nothing" Olivia could not bring her eyes to look at Casey instead she looked everywhere around the room her eyes landing on a photo frame on the bookcase. It was of Casey and her boyfriend.

"You slept with Trevor, didn't you?" Casey's voice was barely above a whisper.

Olivia looked Casey in the eye only to be met with a cold hard glare. "Didn't you?" She yelled

"Casey please, just listen to me. We were drunk, it was one time, it was nothing. You weren't even together." Olivia pleaded with Casey.

"Who the hell do you think you are?" Casey poked her in the chest with each word.

"You're supposed to be my friend and you go around and screw my boyfriend." Casey was now yelling and Olivia was getting worried that someone would over hear the commotion.

"Casey if you..."

"Shut up!"

"Case.."

"You don't get to talk and defend yourself" Casey was breathing heavily in Olivia's face. Olivia knew that they were beyond talking at this point and turned to walk out the door.

"Don't you dare walk away!" Casey screamed.

"I already heard this from Elliot, I'm not going to hear this from you too" Olivia shook her head sadly as tears splashed onto her cheeks. She walked out the door running into the last person in the world she rather not see.

"Trevor" she whispered. "I'm so sorry." She quickly pushed pass him ignoring the calls from him asking if she was alright. She laughed bitterly as she hopped in the elevator thinking he was the one who was going to need help once he stepped into his girlfriends' office.

Olivia cried all the way back to work. She was embarrassed and ashamed of what of her life had been exposed in the last two days. Maybe they are right and I am a slut, she thought sadly, God, please let no other man be made known.

She pushed the doors open to the squad room her eyes red from crying. Munch jumped out of his chair when he saw the way his friend looked. "Liv, are you ok?" He asked his voice thick with concern. Elliot looked up from his desk his heart clenching when he saw the look on her face. He wanted to walk over to her and throw his arms around and whisper words of comfort.

"I don't want to talk about it" She said pushing past Munch and headed straight for the ladies room.

"Elliot, maybe you should try talk to her..." Munch started

"She's not going to want to talk to me" He sighed.

A few minuted passed and Elliot stared blankly at the wall. He was jerked out of his thoughts when an angry Casey Novak came storming in.

"Where the Hell is she?" She demanded to no one in particular.

"Case, calm down woman. Whatcha talkin' about" Fin stood up moving across the room to Casey.

"Olivia. Where is she? I'm not done with her"

Elliot got out of his chair and walked around to Fin and Casey trying to put the pieces of the puzzle together. He was about to ask Casey what was going on when he saw Olivia walk back into the bull pen

"Shit" Olivia muttered when she saw Casey.

"Where not done talking Olivia" Casey said getting in the brunettes face

"Look, I said I was sorry. Casey, if I could take it back I would. I'm so sorry" Olivia placed a hand on Casey's arm but Casey jerked away quickly

Neither woman noticed as the man that they were fighting about walked into the room.

"You know what Liv? I always knew you were easy, I just never knew were an out right whore!" Casey smirked crossing her arms over her chest.

Trevor looked between the two woman conflicted on how best to handle the situation. Casey was his girlfriend, or at least she was till an hour ago, but Olivia had turned out to be a good friend. They had bonded that night over shared pain before their little tryst.

"Casey, I know your upset, so I'm going to forget that you said that" Olivia started " But if you ever speak that way to me again I will make it my business to make your life a living Hell" She spat the words into the lawyers face.

"Look, can't we just go and sit down and talk about this, please Case, Liv" Trevor stepped forward placing a hand on both ladies back.

It was the first time either woman noticed him in the room. Olivia groaned. Trevor you idiot you should not be near me at all at the moment, she thought.

"I don't think so. Have fun with your little one night stand Trevor. Don't bother calling"

Casey stormed pass Fin and Munch and walked out the doors.

"Trevor, you shouldn't have come here." Olivia said. She glanced nervously at Elliot who had his jaw clenched so tight she was sure he was going to crack teeth.

"Well, I thought that with the state Case was in that she might end up killing you. And at the very least she was going to need a good defence attorney" He joked wearily.

Olivia smiled at his attempt to lighten the situation. They stood their looking at each other not sure how or what they could do to fix the whole mess they had created.

"I better go. I'm going to make her talk and listen to me. I'll fix this for us Liv, don't you worry about it''. He moved to her taking her in his arms giving her a big hug.

"I will never regret our night together Liv. It made us what we are today." He said into her hair.

Olivia held back her tears as she nodded her head. She too would never take back that night. She learned something that night. She learned that she should never judge a person solely on their profession; she would from that night forward judge on character. And Trevor Langan was of great character.

They pulled apart Trevor dropping a kiss on her forehead and he walked out the door.

Elliot was in awe at what he just witnessed. What the Hell was going on. Why did she not regret her one night with Trevor Langan? She hated Trevor Langan. How in the world did she end up in bed with him? Maybe he didn't know his partner as well as he thought he did. And what was the power she had on all these men in her life. Trevor had probably lost a girlfriend over this little indiscretion, Declan would have had one hell of a story had he decided to print, Munch and Fin, well they just thought that Olivia was just greatest girl going, Cragen; he knew that situation so that was understandable. And then there was him. He was probably the craziest one there was. A married man, in a loveless marriage, who thinks that Olivia is the sun and the moon.

He watched sadly as Olivia walked up the stairs to the crib shoulders slumped. He took a deep breath. This was it. He was going to go up there and talk to her, really talk to her. And if he had the courage tell her exactly how he feels. There would be no going back. The time had come.


	4. Chapter 4

TRUTH BE TOLD

Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. I just like to play with them.

Summary: Olivia's diary is stolen and someone is using it to reveal embarrassing aspects about her life. E/O of course

A/N: In this story although Elliot went home there never was any pregnancy. Please read and review. Cheers!

SVU Crib Room

3:22 pm

Elliot walked into the crib to see Olivia lying down on the bed she had staked claim to almost nine years ago. She was lying on her back with one arm across her face covering her eyes. He watched her chest rise and fall with each breath she took. He walked quietly over to her cot and stood above her debating with himself on whether or not to wake her. He wanted to talk but he knew that with the day that she had been having maybe it was best to let her sleep. But he didn't need to make the decision.

"Elliot please just leave me alone. I don't have the energy to fight with you anymore. Please, I just…I can't" Her arm was still lying across her face and voice come out sounding defeated. Elliot sighed and took a step back. He didn't want to walk out of this room without a resolution so he sat down on the cot opposite Olivia. The springs squeaked as he lowered his body down into a sitting position facing her. Hearing the bed across from her Olivia groaned loudly in frustration.

"What? What is it that you want?" She sat up facing him with an angry glare on her beautiful features.

"I just want to talk. I want to apologies for what I said earlier. I was wrong Liv. I was so very wrong." He hung his head in shame as he remembered what he said to her and the look that she had as he delivered those cutting words.

"You hurt me you know that Elliot? I would never have thought out of all the men in my life the one that would hurt me the most would be you" Elliot nodded in agreement.

"Don't you think it was hard enough for me that the photo was seen by you? I mean, come on Elliot, you know how I…" she stopped and looked away.

"How you what Liv? How you what?" He asked getting up and sitting next to her on the cot.

Olivia couldn't answer. She looked down at their thighs touching from hip to knee. She so desperately wanted to tell him but that would only make her life more complicated. She wondered if there was a commandment 'Thou shall not covenant thy married partner'. Elliot would probably know.

"I don't care Liv. About Langan or any other man from your past. Everybody comes into a relationship with a history. And we all make my mistakes. I'm still living with mine."

Her eyes quickly moved up to his face. What was he talking about living with his mistake? And what was this thing about going into a relationship knowing people have a past? She wanted to ask him but afraid of his answer. Maybe she was hearing it all wrong. Kathy couldn't be his mistake, he went back. She wanted to talk more about mistakes hoping to get him to tell her his. And at this point how more humiliating could it get? She took a deep breath and went for it.

"Trevor wasn't really a mistake. As much as the situation now is horrible, I can't totally regret what I did." She stole a look at her partner and was surprised to see a look of calm as if he really wanted to understand where she was coming from. This gave her all the courage to continue.

"I had a shit day and I went to O'Malley's. Trevor came in and looked about as good as I felt. I don't even know why he sat down with me. I don't even think we spoke during that first drink together. But then we just started talking and couldn't stop. Told him why I was feeling the way I was, he told me his own sad story… I just didn't want to be alone that night Elliot. I was tired of being alone. And so we went back to my place. In the morning we laughed about it and said that it would never happen again but we had found a good friend in one another. So that's why he's not a mistake. I found a friend when I really needed one."

She looked over at Elliot to saw sadness in his eyes. She sighed and looked away. Maybe telling him wasn't such a good idea. Elliot looked at her and picked up her hand, he turned it over and started drawing lazy circles on her palm. Olivia watched him as he softly drew his fingers across her soft skin. It tickled but she had no power to pull her hand away. She closed her eyes and let the feeling of Elliot touching her draw her in making sure to commit this sweet moment to memory.

"It was the night I moved back home wasn't it?" He whispered still drawing on her hand. Olivia tensed up all over. She wanted him to know a few of the details but she was not ready to let him know that his moving home had hurt her so bad that it drove her into the arms of another man. With her eyes still closed she let her tears splash down on her cheeks. She was not willing to answer him verbally but she was sure that her tears gave him the answer to his question.

Elliot pulled her into a hug, one hand stroking her hair. Olivia's few tears had turned into a shower as she clung to her partner and released all the hurt she felt since the day he told her he was moving home.

"Shsssh it's ok." Elliot soothed into her hair. His loving touches only fuelled her for more tears as she realized that this was the man she was never going to be with. After all these years of secretly waiting and hoping that by some chance he would open his eyes and see the love that she had been wanting to give him had turned into years of waste.

"Livy, I need to tell you something." He kissed her temple as he pulled out of the tight embrace. He looked at her tear stained cheeks and thought he had never seen a more beautiful woman. He was going to tell her. He had to tell her. Because he never wants to be the one to make her go into the arms of another man again, not when his arms were right here waiting for her.

"I made a mistake. A big one that we are all living with." He wiped away at her tears as her face frowned in confusion.

"I don't understand. What mistake?"

"I should never have moved home. I made things worse. For me, for Kathy and for you. God, so much worse for you." His fingers were rubbing delicate circles on her cheeks.

"I have to make things right for all of us. At the moment we are all stuck in some sort of Twilight Zone Hell and none of us are happy, and I'm the crux of it all." He leaned his forehead against hers and took in a deep breath taking in her sweet scent. He loved the way she smelt. He once was in a department store and stopped by the perfume display and tried to find her perfume with no luck and when he asked her what she wore the next day at work she had winked at him and said it was her little secret. He fell a little bit more in love with her that day.

"How are you going to make things right?" She whispered. She silently told herself not to get her hopes up and not to get ahead of herself; he had not said anything about them being together. All he alluded to was that he was wrong to go home, there was nothing said about her being the right choice.

He opened his mouth to answer her but was interrupted by Fin coming into the room. Fin looked at the two detectives before him and shook his head. They were still sitting closely on the cot Elliot's hands on her face their foreheads resting together.

"You guy's betta get your shit together, 'cause Elliot, your wife's downstairs, and man, is she pissed." Fin retreated out of the room.

Elliot let out a groan of frustration as he and Olivia stood up and headed for the door. His wife sure did have perfect timing.

The two walked down into the bull pen in silence lost in thought at what had been spoken about in the crib.

It was not lost on Kathy as she watched the two of them come down from the place she knew was used for sleeping detectives and the anger in her began to surge.

She marched over to the stair case and met them at the bottom of the stair case the anger now a driving force.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS ABOUT?" She demanded so loud that for the second time that day the squad room got a show in front of the stair case.

Olivia caught a glimpse at the piece of paper Kathy was holding and saw her own familiar hand writing.

"Fuck me."She cursed.


	5. Chapter 5

TRUTH BE TOLD

Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. I just like to play with them.

Summary: Olivia's diary is stolen and someone is using it to reveal embarrassing aspects about her life. E/O of course

A/N: It's so hot today (even too hot to swim) so I thought I might as well stay inside and do a little writing. Please read and review. Cheers!

Olivia sucked in a deep breathe. Ohmygodohmygodohmygod. Her heart raced at the thought at what Kathy could be holding in her hand. There was any number of embarrassing possibilities. Olivia racked her brain trying to remember exactly what she could have written that would fuel Kathy's anger. Olivia cursed herself silently. It could be anything from her confessing her love for Elliot onto paper or that she thought that Kathy was a real bitch at times. Either way things were about to get ugly.

"You whore! How long have you been screwing my husband?" Kathy screeched waving the paper in front of her and Elliot. Olivia actually felt a wave of relief wash over her, because she knew that was one thing she had never done. Thank God Kathy was just being a crazy bitch. Elliot looked at Kathy like she had suddenly grown two heads.

"What the Hell are you talking about Kathy? Liv and I have never slept together" He shook his head in anger at his wife's allegations. Not only was she completely wrong but she was causing a scene. Elliot looked around at his colleagues as they tried to pretend that they were not paying attention to the soap opera going on before them.

Kathy laughed bitterly. "Oh really? Listen to this then. _Last night I slept with Elliot up in the cribs. I don't know why I let him climb into my cot with me but I had no desire to stop him. I think it was the best night of my life, I have never felt so loved as he held me. Even now writing this I have __Goosebumps__ thinking of how close we were. I have fallen so in love with this man that I can't even see right from wrong with him. God help me but I want to do last night with him for the rest of my life._" Kathy finished staring at the two of them her eyes clouded with anger.

Elliot looked over at Olivia as she shook her head sorrowfully. He could see the humiliation in her face as once again her secrets had been revealed. Though this time he felt a since of gratification at what he heard. He remembered the night so clearly. It too was one of the best nights of his life. It was after a practically hard case and Olivia couldn't even find the energy to go home so she decided to spend the night in the crib. Elliot went to check on her before he left and as he went into the crib he heard her soft sobs. To this day he still doesn't know what gave him the courage to hop into bed with her but all he knew was that at the moment there was nowhere else he was meant to be. He held her all night long just taking in the feel of her in his arms. After that night he knew things with them would never be the same. He would always want to have that night. He would always want to have them.

He sighed as he walked over to Kathy. "I think we should talk." Elliot said taking the arm of his still angry wife and leading her into one of the interview rooms.

Olivia leaned on a desk as she watched the two of them through the class. Her life was turning to shit right before her eyes. Now everyone knew how she felt for Elliot, of course they had always suspected there were feelings there but now that had the conformation from her own words. Munch came and stood next to her.

"Are you doing ok?" He asked nudging her gently with his shoulder. Much studied the face of his friend she looked to be deep in thought. He was about to ask her again in case she didn't hear him but she turned to look at him with a lost look on her face and quickly turned back to watch the interview room.

"Remember that day" she mused "when we were all sitting around wondering what Hell would be like. And we all agreed that Hell would be different for everyone, so no two Hell's would be the same, and we each said what our own Hell would be like. Well, I'm changing my answer. This right here, this is my Hell. Every day in my own Olivia Hell, this day would play out, small details might change but it would still be this totally fucked up day."

Munch chuckled and shook his friend. "Well what can you do about it right? Your diary is out there. The words have already been written. You just have to accept it and deal with it"

"Yep your right. I have no control over what is coming next. It's totally out of my hands, but it still scares me to think what else could be exposed."

"Well you know you could beat this guy to the punch line. Clear the skeletons out of the closet yourself."

"That's a bit of a catch 22 isn't it? I run around confessing all my secrets that this guy might not even expose. I'll think I will take my chances and deal with the consequences when the time comes."

Elliot and Kathy both came out of the interview room, Kathy's eyes red from crying. Elliot and she walked out of the squad room without a glance in Olivia's and Much's direction. Olivia was dying to know what had been said in that room but she also knew that she could not ask because it was really none of her business.

Elliot came back in and sat at his desk putting his head in his hands. Olivia was about to go over to see if he was alright when Huang came in. Cragen called for the detectives to come into his office. Once they were all gathered in the small room Huang started to give his profile of the man responsible.

"Olivia this guy is obsessed with you and you know him. You might not even know his name but it is someone you have contact with. Someone you might have even turned down."

"I haven't turned anyone down" As soon as she said that she knew how it sounded. Fin snickered and looked at her shaking his head with a huge grin on his face.

"That's not what I meant. What I meant to say is there has been no guy that has asked me out for while that I remember."

"Well, you have to think because this man knows a lot about you." Huang concluded picking up the files he brought in and left the office.

All the detectives left Cragens office and started to gather their things together to leave for the day. Olivia picked up her coat and slung it over her arm as he readied herself to leave. She stole a quick glance at Elliot who made no move to leave for the day. Her mind went back to what could have been said between him and Kathy; he hadn't said a word since she left. Olivia felt a wave of guilt wash over her and the full ramifications of what she had written in her diary hitting her. She had messed up this man's marriage, it didn't matter that he himself had said going back home was a mistake she was still a contributing factor in the breakdown. And now her best friend sat across from her looking completely dejected.

"Hey, El? I just want to say that I am so sorry about today with Kathy and all. I wish I never wrote in that stupid diary. I'm just so truly sorry."

Elliot looked into her eyes and saw true sympathy. He couldn't believe that in the midst of all her own problems that she truly was concerned with the problems within his marriage. He shook his head in wonder; she really was the most caring woman he had ever known. This is exactly why he loved her so much, she would always put those she cared for and loved before herself.

"Well, if you really want to make it up to me, you could let me stay at you place tonight. I'm newly homeless and I really don't enjoy sleeping in my car." He asked with a hopeful grin.

Olivia thought for a moment before she answered him. This could be dangerous. His marriage had just ended after her confessions of love and not to mention what was said in the crib early today. If she took him home she might not be able to resist nature's temptation. But who was she kidding, off course she was going to let him come home with her.

"Ok, but no funny business. I'll let you sleep on my couch but that's it" She smiled wagging a slender finger at him.

They gathered their stuff and headed for the elevator. It arrived with a ding and the two of them stepped in.

"We'll see. You never know you might get the urge to recreate that photo of yours".

She gasped at him and gave him a back handed slap to his chest. Tonight was going to be very interesting.


	6. Chapter 6

TRUTH BE TOLD

Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. I just like to play with them.

Summary: Olivia's diary is stolen and someone is using it to reveal embarrassing aspects about her life. E/O of course

A/N: I don't know how much longer this is going to be. I think I know how it will end though. Thanks to everyone who has read and reviewed. You guys are the best!

Olivia and Elliot entered her apartment in silence, not had much had been said since they left the precinct. Olivia had a whole new set of concerns on her mind. She wondered if it was such a great idea after all bringing Elliot home to her place considering the day's events and she also had her conversation with Munch on her mind about coming clean. There was still one more thing she felt she needed to get of her chest but was hesitant to tell Elliot in case that would be the one thing he would not forgive her for.

"I'm going to go take a shower. You know where everything is, make yourself at home." She walked back to her bedroom and shut the door softly behind her.

Elliot glanced around her apartment. It had been awhile since he had been here and he was comforted to know that nothing seemed to have changed. He sat down on the couch and flipped on the television. He wasn't really watching anything his mind was playing over the day's events. He had seen his partner in bed with her best friends boyfriend, they had somewhat admitted that they had feelings for each other in the crib, and best all, for him, he found out that the night they spent in the crib had meant something to her. So why was she acting so distant. He could feel her pulling away the moment they had got into the car to come home. Something else was bothering her and Elliot was starting to get an uneasy feeling in the pit of his stomach. Why could things not be easy for the two of them? Why were there always challenges to overcome?

Olivia had been in the bathroom a good hour before she finally returned to the lounge room. She had on a pair of lilac satin pajama shorts and a white camisole. She had blow dried her hair so it was all soft and fluffy around her face. Elliot looked up at her when she walked into the lounge room and let out an inward groan. What was she trying to do to him? All he could think about was pulling her onto his lap and attacking her with sweet kisses. Olivia noticed Elliot's lingering gaze and placed her arms across her stomach in an attempt to obstruct his view. Elliot blushed at having been caught mentally devouring his partner.

She walked over and sat next to him on the couch making sure to put enough distance between the two of them.

"So……?" She almost laughed out loud at the tension in the air.

"So……?" Elliot responded

"You know this is stupid. We're two grown adults. Let's just talk it out''

"Ok. Well, do you have anything you want to talk about?" Elliot asked turning to face her.

Olivia licked her lips. She should tell him her last secret. John was right it would probably be better to come clean instead it come up at a later date. Even if this guy didn't expose her, there was always a chance that this could come back and bite her in the ass.

"Yeah, there is something." Olivia shifted uncomfortably. "Elliot, please just don't get mad. I did something stupid. Another something stupid. I'm good at doing those."

She looked away. This was harder than she thought it was going to be. Elliot took her hand in his and gave it a gentle squeeze. "It's ok, you can tell me."

"Don't. Don't show that you care 'cause you might not after I tell you this." She pulled her hand from his grip. She picked nervously at an invisible speck on her leg.

"When I was in Oregon I kinda fucked up big time. Not the undercover crap, well I kinda messed that up but that's another story. I did something, for no reason other than the fact that I could. It meant nothing and the moment it was over I had never felt so disappointed in myself. I called Casey, she told me about Beck. I was hurt and angry at you."

Olivia looked up and into his eyes; she saw the recognition was to what she was alluding to. She shook her head. "Don't make me say it Elliot." She whispered

"Porter". Elliot stood up quickly and started pacing the room. He didn't know what to feel. He was in love with her, that he knew, but he wasn't sure he could get pass something like the men she choose to sleep with. Not with Porter. Elliot hated Porter. Every time he saw him he just wanted to deck the guy. He had only ever been with Kathy and Kathy only ever been with him. This life that she led of sleeping with people she had no solid feelings for was a lifestyle he was not accustomed to.

"Elliot, today in the crib you said that everybody comes into a relationship with history. Well, this is my history, and I'm not proud of it but I can't change it. This is who I am"

"I know what I said. It's just…I hate that I want to have something with you and I know that in the back of my mind I will be thinking that your giving me nothing that you haven't given some other guy."

Olivia felt the fury rise into her chest she stood up and went over to him. " WHAT?"

"Liv, it's just how I feel. I can't change that. I want to but I don't think I can"

"How about love you idiot. I would have given you love. Something I have never given any man". She stormed off to her bedroom slamming her door hard enough to make the windows in her apartment rattle.

Elliot knew the moment the words left his mouth it was mistake and hearing her say that she would have given him love only made the pain that he was now feeling in his chest intensify. What had he done? He had loved her for years and all she was trying to do was be honest and he threw her honesty back in her face. He was a monster. He walked quietly over to her bedroom door debating on whether or not to go in. He was about to take the plunge and go in when he heard the soft sounds of her sobbing. Elliot felt his own tears start to wheal up in his eyes. The day had been nothing short of a disaster. He had finally found the courage to tell his wife that moving home was a mistake and that he would be moving back out and he had destroyed any chance he had with Olivia due to his own insecurities. He picked up his coat and walked to the front door pulling it shut behind him thinking that tonight was probably the last night he would ever be inside Olivia Benson's apartment.

Olivia sat up when she heard the sound of her front door closing she listened carefully to hear if there was any movement coming from the lounge room. Hearing nothing she decided to take a look already knowing what she was going to find on the other side of her bedroom door. She opened her door slightly a peeked out. Seeing nothing she ventured into the lounge room. She quickly noticed Elliot's coat missing. She sat down on the lounge a let a fresh flow of tears escape the confines of her eyes. He had left. He didn't even try to make things right. Olivia had all the answer's she needed. She was obviously nothing to Elliot Stabler she thought bitterly, he was probably already headed back to Queens asking to come back home. Olivia had never felt a pain like this in her chest. It felt as if her heart was literally breaking. She has had friends who have spoken of broken hearts before and remembered as they described the physical pain that they felt and thought that they were just exaggerating, but sitting here all alone Olivia was somewhat surprised that her heart would physically ache for something. Damn Elliot, once her heart healed itself she will never allow it to be broken again. The heart leads to nowhere good. She didn't need love and she sure as Hell didn't need Elliot Stabler.


	7. Chapter 7

TRUTH BE TOLD

Disclaimer: Not mine, never will be. I just like to play with them.

Summary: Olivia's diary is stolen and someone is using it to reveal embarrassing aspects about her life. E/O of course

A/N: Don't worry guys. They will definitely hook up at some point in this story.

Olivia walked into work the next morning her body feeling like it was weighed down with lead. She had tossed and turned all night thinking about what Elliot had said to her. She couldn't believe he could be so critical of her life. She learned her lesson last night; never again would she divulge information about past relationships to a man. Not that she had to worry about that any more. She was going to stick with what she vowed last night. No more using of her heart, all she had to do now was get Elliot out of it.

She walked over to her desk grateful that Elliot had not yet arrived for work. She didn't want to have to see him at the moment; she hadn't made up her mind on how she was going to be with him today. She could go two ways. She could be mad and let him and everyone know it or she could just ignore him, which she knew drove him more crazy than having her come right out and say she was pissed at him. Decisions, decisions.

"Hey Liv, where's your partner at?" Munch walked by with a steaming cup of coffee, if you could call what he made coffee, in his hand.

"Don't know. And I really don't care" She answered not looking up from the pile of paper work sitting on her desk. Munch shrugged his shoulders and went to sit at his desk. Olivia worked quietly for a few more minutes until Cragen's office door opened up. "Benson, where's your partner?" Olivia looked up to her captain and shrugged her shoulders. Cragen slammed his door shut and Olivia went back to work. Ten minutes later Lake wondered pass her desk and smiled down at her. "Hi Liv. Hey, where's Elliot?" He asked walking over to his desk. Olivia threw her pen down and stood up. "Jesus Christ! I'm not Elliot's God damn keeper. Ok. I don't know where he is and I really don't care." She stood up and headed over to the coffee pot. She didn't even drink coffee anymore but she needed a distraction after her little outburst. "Guess the sleep over didn't go so well, huh?" Munch said to no one in particular. "Shut up Munch" Olivia yelled at him across the room.

"I was joking, ok?" Munch said, his voice laced with hurt. Olivia heard the tone in her friends voice and was about to turn around and apologies but was interrupted by the chiming of her cell phone. She sighed in frustration and flipped it open.

"Benson"

"Hello. Is this Olivia Benson?"

"Yes, this is she. Who's this?"

"Hi, my name is Betty Miller. I'm a nurse here at Mercy General. Your listed as a Mr. Elliot Stabler's in case of emergency contact. I'm calling to let you know he has just been brought into the ER."

Olivia felt her knees start to buckle from underneath you and she quickly grabbed the stair case railing. A million thoughts went through her mind as to what could have happened to him. She blinked rapidly and tried to stay focus, she knew she had to get more details.

"W what happened to him?" She barely managed to get the words out.

"It looks like he had been assaulted. I'm sorry; I really don't have much more information. Could you please come down here as soon as you can?" The nurse's voice was soft and soothing; she hated making calls like this.

"I'm coming right now"

Olivia closed her phone and walked back over to her desk. Her hands were shaking so much she was having trouble with the zip on her hand bag. "Fuck" she cried out in frustration as the zip fall again from her hand. Fin looked up and saw Olivia's whole body trembling; he quickly got out of his chair and went to her side. "Baby, what's going on?'' He asked placing his hands over her trembling ones. "I, ah, I have to go…Elliot. I have to go. He needs me. Hurt. Got to go" She was rambling as she looked through her purse for her keys.

"Stop. Liv, what do you mean he is hurt?" Fin's question got the attention of Munch and Lake and they came up and stood next to Fin.

"I don't know. I have to get to the hospital" Olivia answered still looking for her keys. "Damn it, where are they" she muttered.

The three guys exchanged worried looks. "We will take her to the hospital. Lake, you go to the captain and meet us down there. What hospital Liv?" Munch asked.

"Huh?" Olivia's mind was racing she was finding it hard to string her thoughts together, all her thoughts were incomplete and she was finding it hard to focus on anything. Munch grabbed her by her shoulders and shook her slightly. "Listen to me. What hospital?" He spoke his words very slowly.

"Mercy. Mercy General"

Fin and Munch pulled Olivia out with them and headed for Munch's car. The ride over was very quiet. Olivia looked down at her still shaking hands, she could feel panic swirling through her. Her heart started racing and her breathing started to become labored. Something was wrong. "Guy's? I think something's wrong with me. I don't feel so good" Olivia called to them in the front seat. Fin turned around and Munch adjusted his rear view mirror to look at her. Her face was completely drained of blood and she was shaking uncontrollably. Fin and Munch looked at each other. Fin unbuckled his seat belt and turned as far back as he could between the two front seats. "Liv, tell me what's going on?" He asked patting her knee.

"I can't breathe. I'm so scared. I think I'm having some sort of heart attack" She whispered. Munch looked at her in the mirror. "She's having a panic attack. Calm her down" Munch said quietly.

"How?"

"Just talk her out of it"

"Liv, sweetie. Look at me. You're going to be ok. Ok? You're just a little upset at the moment, you have to calm down" Fin said in the most reassuring voice her could muster.

"But Elliot…"

"Elliot's going to be fine as well. Just close your eyes and take some deep breathes." Fin started to demonstrate deep breathing and Olivia followed suit. She closed her eyes and concentrated on her breathing. All she needed was to see him. Once she saw that he was going to be ok she would be fine. Tears pushed passed her lashes spilling onto her cheeks.

They pulled up at the hospital and jumped out of the car. Olivia's legs wobbled slightly. Munch saw her shaky stance and came around to her putting his arm around her waist and guided her into the hospital.

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The three of them were sitting on hard plastic chairs in a small waiting room. They had not heard any news on how Elliot was. Olivia had her head back and her eyes closed concentrating on not giving into her fear.

"How is he?" Cragen asked coming into the room slightly out of breath. Lake was right behind him.

"We haven't heard anything yet" Munch answered standing up and pacing the room. Cragen came and sat down next to Olivia placing a hand on her knee and giving it a gentle squeeze.

"What happened to my husband?"

Olivia's eyes flew open at the sound of Kathy's voice. The two women looked at each other no expression on either face. "What happened to him Olivia?" Kathy asked quietly coming to stand right in front of her. Olivia looked into Kathy's eyes and was surprised to see only concern and not the hatred she was sure would be in her own eyes had the situation be reversed.

"I don't know. I'm so sorry." Olivia was apologizing for more than not having the information that Kathy was asking for, she was apologizing to this woman for falling in love with her husband. Olivia really was sorry for any pain she had caused Kathy and her family.

Kathy could hear the meaning in her apology. She sighed and took a seat opposite Olivia. "I know you're sorry Olivia. We all are." She quietly replied.

Olivia was stunned at the turnaround of events. Less than twenty four hours ago Kathy was calling her a whore and now she seemed almost at peace with whole Elliot/Olivia situation.

Olivia wanted to say more but was interrupted by a man in scrubs who walked into the room. He smiled at the gathering of people in the small waiting room.

"You are all here for Mr. Stabler?" The group nodded their heads. "Popular man. Well I have good news. He's going to be fine. He has two broken ribs lots of bruising. Now he did have a lacerated liver," Olivia gasped. "But we managed to repair that with surgery."

"He's going to fine though right?" Olivia asked standing up.

"He's going to be fine. You must be Olivia" The doctor asked smiling at her. Olivia cocked her head the side and gave him a puzzled look. She didn't think anyone had said her name since he walked in so she was surprised that he knew her name.

"You're wondering how I knew that. Elliot. Before we sedated him for surgery he kept on telling us about his beautiful girl Olivia. He wouldn't shut up about you. You can go see him he's in room 213. I'm sure he would love to see you." The doctor left the room. Olivia turned around to see five sets of eyes staring at her. She didn't know what to do. What the doctor had said completely surprised her. Elliot was calling her his girl, but maybe that was the drugs or his own fear that was talking and not his rational mind.

"Liv, are you going up to see him?" Cragen asked stepping over to him.

"Umm no, you guys go ahead I have some stuff to take care of."

She walked out of the waiting room leaving the five of them standing in shock.

Olivia walked out of the hospital and leaned against the cold hard wall and cried. She hated him for what he was doing to her. How dare he say that he won't be able to get over her past and then be telling strangers she was his girl? She hailed a cab and gave the address to her apartment. No she wouldn't go see him. She was cutting him out of her personal life starting from right now. No more Elliot Stabler for her.


	8. Chapter 8

Discalimer: Not mine

A/N: I seemed to have upset a few of you with Olivia not going to see Elliot in the hospital. So hopefully this will satisfy.

Truth Be Told

Elliot couldn't believe the amount of pain that was coursing through his body; every part of him felt like it was on fire. But that was nothing compared to the pain he was feeling in his chest. He couldn't believe that Olivia had not come to see him. Fin said that she was upset and that she might need time but that was 12 hours ago, how much time did a girl need. He needed her here with him; she was all he had ever needed. Elliot could kick himself for what he said to her the previous night. At the time he really believed what he was saying but in the light of day sitting all alone in a cold impersonal hospital room, he would take her anyway he could get her. Pass mistakes and all. He picked up his cell again and dialed her number for the fourteenth time since he had been admitted.

"Liv. Are you there? Please pick up. I just… I just need to talk to you. I need to tell you how sorry I am. Pleas Liv. Talk to me." The answering machine was his new relationship with Olivia. She wasn't taking his calls, either on her cell or her home phone. He debated on whether or not to rip the i.v from his arm and go and bang on her apartment door to see her thought better of it. In the state he was in he probably wouldn't make it pass the hospital doors.

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Olivia listened as her phone rang and the answering machine picked up. She sipped at her red wine as she listened to another call from Elliot begging her to talk. She had to stay strong, if she caved now she would be caving the rest of her life with him. No, there could be no more Elliot. She still hadn't worked out how it was going to affect work. No way was she going to quit SVU but maybe she could ask for a new partner. Lake had no one, maybe she could team up with him.

Olivia looked at her watch, 12:58 am. She walked to the kitchen and poured the remainder of her wine down the drain and headed off to bed. She closed her eyes and tried to will sleep to come and take her way but it stayed away at a distance. The feeling to see Elliot was intensifying within her body. She turned over to her side and gazed out the window. She willed herself not to brake. An hour later Olivia was no closer to sleep and the feeling to see Elliot was now pulsating through her mind. She glanced at the alarm clock on her night stand, almost two am. Maybe she could go to the hospital and just take a peek at him to ease her mind. If she just saw him with her own eyes maybe she would be able to get some sleep. She laid in bed thinking of her plan of going to the hospital debating with herself on to go or not. She let out a load groan and threw the covers off her and got up and got dressed.

The hospital was very quiet and Olivia had no problem getting past the Nurses Station by flashing her badge. She walked down the corridor and stood outside the closed door of room 213. She paused a moment before she walked in the room. Just a look, that's all she needed. She took a deep breath and pushed open the door slowly. The room was dark and she could barely make out the figure lying on the bed. She stepped in and quietly closed the door behind her. She tiptoed over to his bed and looked down. A tear slid down her face as she looked at the angry bruise on his left cheek. "Oh Elliot" she whispered as she gently brushed her fingers over his bruise. Once she touched him she knew all hope to stay away was lost. He was her Elliot. How could she walk away from him?

Olivia removed her jacket and silently slipped in beside him lying on the bed. She turned on her side so she was facing him, throwing an arm across his chest. She nuzzled her face into the crook of his neck and shoulder and took a deep breath in inhaling all Elliot. This is where she belonged, she had found home.

Elliot woke up feeling a slight pressure on his chest, for a moment he thought it had something to do with his broken ribs when he heard a small moan. His eyes sprung open. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. She had come. And not only that but she had curled her body around his holding tightly to his side. He put his nose into her and gentle nuzzled her. She let out another small moan. He couldn't believe it, Olivia was a moaner. And the sounds that she was emitting were starting to take effect of his body. He gentle stroked her cheek in an attempt to wake her. She barley stirred at his touches. He smiled. She was content with him, he had made her content. But he wanted to talk to her, so as much as he wanted to let her sleep he began his mission of waking her up.

He blew softly into her face. Olivia scrunched up her nose but still remained asleep. Ok, onto plan B. He looked down and saw that through the night her shirt had raised a little exposing the soft toned skin of her waist. He started thumbing the skin there lightly. He watched as her skin contracted as he found a ticklish spot. "No stop, you're tickling" she groaned out. He smiled and kissed the side of her face. "I see I had a late night visitor." He whispered into her ear. Olivia looked up into his cerulean eyes. No turning back. "I thought you might have missed me." She said taking the hand that was touching the side of her face and lacing their fingers together. "Liv, I'm so sor…" She silenced him with a finger to his lips. "Don't El. It's already been said and done, let's not talk about it." His eyes looked at her confused. Could it really be that easy for her to forgive him? "No, there will never be another time I forgive you so easily. You just used your one get out of jail free card" She smiled a full smile. He shook his head amazed she knew what his thinking, just like she always did.

"Liv?"

"Hmm?"

"Can I kiss you?"

"You better." He moved his face closer to hers never taking his eyes from her. He leaned in as she closed her eyes he smiled at her closing her eyes. He brushed his lips gentle across hers. He sucked tenderly at her lower lip and ran his tongue along the seam of her lips seeking entrance. She complied without hesitation and moaned as his tongue slipped inside her mouth meeting with her own. She pulled his head lower to her desperate to have him close. Elliott pulled away from her mouth and started to work on her jaw line. She dragged her nails through his hair and let out a load moan "Oh God, don't stop" she rasped out. Elliot's pajama pants were starting to feel tight her moaning was going to be the death of him. "Liivvv, you feel so good" He groaned attacking her neck with his lips.

"Yes, but how do you feel Mr. Stabler"

Olivia and Elliot sat up so fast that the knocked heads trying to detangle their limbs. Olivia's face flushed with embarrassment. She moved of the bed pulling her shirt down as she moved away. The doctor laughed as the sight of the two embarrassed detectives. Elliot sat up straighter in bed his face the same color as Olivia's.

"Well, I just came to see how the patient was recovering. By the looks of things, he's feeling quiet good. I'll leave you two to it. Keep in mind the nurses will be doing their rounds in the next fifteen minutes." He smirked as he walked out the door.

"Well that was embarrassing" Elliot said running a hand through his hair.

"Yep, it was"

Olivia looked over at Elliot and grinned. She got out of the chair she was now sitting in and walked back over to the bed.

"So what he say we have? Fifteen minutes right?" She grinned wickedly at him and moved into kiss him. Before her lips could touch his the door flung open again. Fin and Lake came walking in the room.

"We think we have him Liv."

"What? Who?"

"The guy who took your diary and the guy who put Elliot here. Come on"

Olivia looked at Elliot with wide eyes. She hadn't even thought that the person causing mayhem with her diary could have also been the one to put Elliot in hospital. She grabbed her jacket and slipped it on.

"Ok I'm ready let's go." The three of them started to walk out of the door.

"Wait, wait, wait. I forgot something" She turned around and went back over to Elliot and kissed him delicately on his lips. "I'll be back" She whispered.

Fin and Lake grinned at each other. It was about time.

"Ok. Let's go do this." Olivia sauntered out of the room.

This guy had messed with her life and he had messed with Elliot. He was going to pay.


	9. Chapter 9

Disclaimer: Not mine. Yada Yada Yada

A/N: I have had so much fun writing this I'm already planning my next story. Thanks for all the reviews. They are such a driving force for quick updates.

TRUTH BE TOLD

Olivia walked briskly into the SVU squad room. Fin was hot on her heels. He had warned her to keep her cool on the ride over from the hospital but it seemed to have fallen on deaf ears. Munch looked up when the two of them walked in. He could see from the look on her face that she was ready to kick some ass.

"Olivia, play it cool ok?" Munch cautioned peering at her over his glasses.

"Don't I always play it cool? Now where is he?" Olivia asked dismissing Munch's warning.

"Interrogation Room 1"

Olivia grabbed the folder Munch was holding, she didn't wait for them to advise her not to go in there. She was on a mission. She walked quickly to the interrogation room and glanced through the glass on-way mirrored window. Olivia frowned. She recognized him but she couldn't place from where. Huang told her she would know him but her memory had failed her in regards to the suspect. She took a deep breath and pushed open the door.

"Mr. Delany. Detective Benson. I presume you know why you're here. So let's get right down to it" She kept her voice steady

"Actually why don't you tell me why I'm here" Brian Delany asked. Olivia felt an uneasiness engulf her. There was something about Delany that she couldn't quiet place her finger her on.

"Well, for starters, attempted murder on my partner."

"I didn't try to kill no one. Maybe someone was just trying to knock some sense into him" He smirked rocking back and forward on his chair.

Olivia glanced at him trying to get a read on him. The way he said about knocking sense into Elliot made Olivia convinced that this was there guy. She kept her eyes on him as she moved to stand behind him slightly to his right.

"Now why would someone need to knock some sense into my partner?"

"Maybe, and this is just a maybe, he's been running around with some hoe, you know? And this was just a little wake up call to say she ain't worth it"

Olivia could feel her blood starting to boil. She knew he knew that he was getting to her. She had to remain in control of the situation.

"So, tell me Mr. Delany. How is it that you know me?" Olivia questioned. She started to walk slow circles around him, like a lion stalking it's pray.

"Never seen you in my life. But I bet I can read you like a book."

"Or more like a diary." She retorted

He looked at her and grinned his eyes not reflecting the grin on his face.

"Why?" She asked placing both hands firmly on the table across from him and leaning in a bit.

"Because whore's need to pay." Delany leaned forward and whispered. "It hurt you more didn't it, me going after him? The diary thing, as much fun as it was, you still hadn't paid your dues." Olivia walked back around behind him; Delany was now leaning forward in his chair balancing on the front two legs. "You should have heard him scream as I broke his ribs. Tears in his eyes, he did." Delany laughed at the memory.

Olivia felt her anger hit its limit and snapped. She walked over to the back of Delany's chair and kicked the back legs of the chair causing it to slide out from underneath him. Delany fell slamming his chin into the hard table top, blood almost instantly pouring from his mouth.

"Opps, sorry about that. Slipped."

Delany quickly stood up and backed handed her across the face. Olivia stumbled back. Before she had a chance to fight back the door flew open and Fin and Cragen charged in. Fin grabbed Delany throwing him face down on the table and slapping handcuffs on him and began reading him his rights.

"You ok Liv?" Cragen asked coming over to stand next to her.

"Yep, I'm good" Olivia answered rubbing a hand across the face which she was sure was already starting to bruise.

Fin dragged Delany out to book him. Olivia picked up the file and walked out to the bull pen, Cragen close behind.

"Liv, I know how he knows you." Munch came walking over to the two of them. "You worked a case the first year you were here. Delany was charged with domestic abuse. Wife was cheating on him; he had to teach her a lesson."

Olivia tried to remember the case but really couldn't remember many details only that it was a pretty much an open and shut case. She didn't even directly deal with Delany, only advised his wife to leave him for her own protection.

"He must have had it in for you for years." Cragen guessed. "Casey will be down here soon. She thinks she can get at least twenty years."

Olivia nodded. All this over a domestic call that happened almost 9 years ago. She had been humiliated, lost a friend and worst of all she almost lost Elliot. She sighed in frustration; it was days like this that throwing it all in seemed quiet appealing.

Olivia started on the paper work that she knew Casey was going to need. She was hoping she could get it all done before she arrived to avoid another confrontation.

"Hey. Do you have the paperwork for Delany?"

Olivia looked up startled. She wasn't expecting Casey so soon.

"Uh yeah, just give me a sec." She quickly dropped her eyes. Olivia began to feel nervous with Casey standing so close. She hated when someone was mad at her, especially a good friend.

Casey looked Olivia over. She could see a bruise on her cheek and could only assume that it came from Delany.

"That bruise from Delany?"

"Ah huh"

"If it makes you feel any better he lost three teeth"

Olivia just nodded.

Casey huffed. Olivia was not going to make this easy. After she left the squad room leaving Olivia and Langan she went home and had a good cry. She knew that it was stupid to be angry at the two of them; she wasn't even with Trevor when he slept with Olivia. It was the shock that made her react that way. Trevor had come over to her apartment apologizing profusely for not telling her right from the start. She forgave him, like she knew she would, so all that was left now was to fix things between her and Olivia.

"Liv. I'm sorry about what I said the other day. I didn't mean it." Casey said quietly

Olivia looked up at her friend. She wanted things to be good between her and Casey again but she had serious doubts. "You really hurt me. I know I should have told you, but I left it to late and you were so happy and I didn't want to take away from your happiness."

"I know. Trevor and I had a long talk. We're good but I need to be good with you. You're my friend Olivia. I don't want to lose my friend. Not over a guy."

"Neither do I"

"So are we going to be ok?"

Olivia stood up and smiled at Casey. "We will be." Casey smiled back and pulled Olivia in for a big hug.

"Ok, so I never want to be in this situation again with you. So from now on if either one of us starts to see a new guy we ask each other straight out if the other one has ever slept with him. Deal?" Casey asked pulling away from Olivia.

Olivia handed the papers that Casey needed to her and started to gather her stuff together so she could get back over to the hospital.

"Deal. So uh, Case, you ever sleep with Elliot?" Olivia asked coyly

"No Way. You and Elliot?" Casey squealed.

Olivia just smiled and walked out the door to go see her favorite partner.

**A/N: I think one or two chapters more. Need to reinforce the EOness. Please review. **


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: Not mine. Oh but how I wish they were.

TRUTH BE TOLD

Olivia decided to go home and have a shower before going back to the hospital. She was still wearing the clothes from last night and was starting to feel a little grungy. She stepped under the hot stream and let the water wash over her body. Her mind wondered to the thought of Elliot. She smiled as her stomach tightened at her thoughts. She had kissed Elliot. And if the Doctor hadn't walked in she probably done a lot more. She stepped out of the shower wrapping herself in a large fluffy towel. She walked over to her dresser draw and selected out a pair of matching pink lace panties and bra. She put on the jeans she knew Elliot liked, because they hugged her arse, and a soft white cable knit sweater with a scoop neck line. She quickly fixed her hair and put on a touch of makeup. She grabbed her keys and walked out the door.

Olivia's heart started to flutter. She scolded herself for acting like a horny teenager. She had to remind herself that this was a hospital and not a place for her to end her eight year ache. She smiled at the thought that all the waiting would soon come to an end. She had been patient, and now her patience was finally going to pay off. Olivia rounded the corner and headed for Elliot's room. Her heart almost stopped when she saw who was standing outside Elliot's room. Dean Porter.

Olivia's palms started to sweat. She hadn't seen Dean since she fled his hotel room in the early hours on the morning of The Great Mistake, as she was now referring to it as. Dean was on his cell phone and looked up and smiled when he saw her standing there staring at him opened mouth.

"Liv. its good to see you" He smiled in earnest. Olivia closed the gap between them and came to stand right outside Elliot's room.

"Dean, what are you doing here?" She whispered, biting her lip nervously.

"I heard what happened to Elliot, and will, one of the guys from your squad told me I could probably find you here".

He looked at her and frowned when his eyes landed on her bruised cheek.

"Li, sweet, what happened?" He asked his hand reaching out to touch her bruise. She jerked away before his hand could make contact with her. Dean's brow furrowed in confusion. He knew that her running out the morning after the night they had slept together wasn't good but he thought that she had some feelings for him. She had slept with him after all.

"Dean, I really don't think you should be here." She was still whispering and looking nervously at Elliot's door noticing that it was slightly ajar. She knew that if Elliot saw her with Dean that it would set her and Elliot back, maybe even damage them for good.

Dean took in the way her eyes darted nervously at the door and back to his face he stepped closely to her, his body only inches away from her own. "Your sleeping with him, aren't you?"

"It's none of your business who the Hell I'm sleeping with?"

"I don't know why I'm surprised. I mean didn't really take much effort from me to get you into my bed" He said snidely grabbing hold of her wrist. "You remember that Liv, don't you? I sure as Hell do. You remember how you screamed out my name as I made you come?"

"What can I say? I'm a good actress." She spat back her eyes dark with anger.

The two of them stood glaring at each other, Dean still having a tight hold of her wrist.

"I think I might have to report this Liv. I'm sure your captain would like to know that two of his detectives are screwing."

"Yeah, that's some story you're peddling. Well listen to mine. Female detective goes off to work undercover with some big shot FBI guy. FBI guy takes advantage of said female detective while she's drunk and working in an environment she's not at all familiar with. How's that sound? To me it sounds like sexual harassment at its worst. Not a pretty thing to have in that very important personal file of yours."

"That's not how it happened Olivia, and you know it. You wouldn't dare do that" He said his eyes narrowing.

"Oh I wouldn't? You leave me and you leave Elliot alone and know one will ever need to know about your little indiscretion on the job. Got it?"

Olivia's heart was pounding in her chest. She hoped to God Dean wouldn't call her bluff. She would do anything to keep herself and Elliot working together but lying to the FBI would be pushing it a bit.

Dean held her gaze seeing her fiery determination. He knew that Olivia and her partner were tight, he had heard the rumours, but he couldn't believe the risk she was willing to take for him. He shook his head in defeat. In her eyes he was no match to Elliot Stabler. "Be careful Olivia. You will get caught doing what you're doing." He said softly.

Olivia's eyes soften slightly at the new tone of Dean's voice. She nodded faintly. Dean dropped her wrist and walked away without a glance back. Olivia let out a deep breath, relief washing over her. She smiled as she pushed open the door.

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Elliot was just making his way from the small ensuite in his room when he heard Olivia's voice and another one he couldn't quite place just outside the door. The door was slightly ajar from the last nurse's visit. He glanced through the small crack and felt his stomach drop at who he saw. Dean Fucking Porter. Elliot's hands immediately clenched at his side. He hated Dean. He hated Dean for taking Olivia way from him, he hated him for sleeping with Olivia, and he even hated his full head of thick luscious hair. He hated him.

He listened carefully. He could hear the distress in Olivia's voice pleading with him to go. For one moment he became full of self doubt. Why would Olivia want him? He was older than Dean, he had no temper control, and he wasn't even divorced from his wife. Elliot Stabler was definitely not the complete package. He was about to give in to his self pity when he heard Dean say something about Olivia screaming his name in bed. Rage was about to take on an all new meaning. He was just about to reach for the door and beat Dean to a pulp when he heard Olivia's comeback. That's my Liv, he thought a smile spreading across his face, you tell him he's no good in bed and your about to get some better. He quickly made his way back to his bed knowing it wouldn't be long till Olivia came in.

He settled himself back into bed pulling his sheets up to his chest. A couple of minutes later Olivia walked in, her face lit up in a full smile as she walked over to stand next to his bed. He would never get sick of that smile he decided. He returned her smile but it quickly faded seeing her bruised face.

"What happened to you face?" He asked leaning over to gently touch her marked skin.

She smiled taking his hand away from her face and placing a kiss into the palm of his hand. "Nothing."

Elliot knew when to push for answers and right now was not the time. He nodded his understanding at the hidden meaning of her words and pulled her onto the bed with him. She smiled as her body went up against his. Elliot put one arm around the back of her waist to hold her in place and the other across her stomach. He nuzzled at her neck with his lips. Olivia giggled and squirmed a little to get him to stop.

"Detective Stabler, what do you think you're doing?" Her voice low and husky

"Hmm..I missed you" His lips were still marking their territory along her lean neck. He moved up her neck and licked at the skin just behind her ear. Olivia let out a low moan. He had found her sensitive spot. Her moaning only seemed to encourage him more as his hand slid down and popped the button in her jeans. Olivia was unaware of her popped button her attention was focused on the incredible feeling his lips were creating in her neck. What she did hear was the sound of her zipper being slowly pulled down and the feel of Elliot's hand slowly creeping down into her jeans. Olivia's eyes snapped open as she quickly put her hand on top of his to stop him. Elliot looked at her with questioning eyes.

"I- can't do this here. I'm sorry. I feel like an idiot. I was leading you on" Olivia apologised embarrassed by the whole situation. She dropped her eyes not wanting to see the disappointment in his beautiful eyes. Elliot placed his hand under her chin and raised her face so she was again looking him in the eye.

"Hey, it's ok. You're right, here is all wrong. You deserve somewhere with rose petals and a thousand burning candles" He smiled at her stroking her cheek gently with his thumb.

"Well you don't have to take it to the extreme Elliot. I'd be happy with a king size bed and a guarantee that no one was going to walk through the door." She said with a cheeky grin.

"Well the moment I'm out of here and I see a king size bed in a room with a lock on the door, you're all mine." He kissed her forehead. She laughed and wrinkled her nose.

"Can we at least make sure this desired king bed has clean sheets?"

Elliot nodded. "Only the best for my Liv."

**A/N: One more chapter to go. Thanks for the reviews. They are great!!!**


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: I'm sorry it took me forever to get this up, I just couldn't get my muse to cooperate with me. But he's back now so all's good. This is the last chapter, I hope you guys like it. Thanks for everyone who has read and reviewed. You guys are the greatest!

TRUTH BE TOLD

Olivia unlooked her apartment and walked in closely followed by Elliot. He had been released from the hospital into Olivia's care and would be staying with her for a week to recuperate. Olivia took his duffle bag and placed it in the small closet in the entry way.

"Make yourself at home." She said as she made her way into the kitchen.

Elliot went and sat on the overstuffed couch and leaned his head back into the soft cushions. He was still a little surprised that Olivia had agreed for him to come and stay with her, he could of always gone home and have his eldest daughter keep an eye on him. He smiled to himself at the thought of having so much alone time with her. Even after all the years they had known each other they rarely spent time together outside the work place.

Olivia came back into the room carrying two cups of steaming coffee. She handed one to Elliot who accepted with a slight nod of his head. They sat in silence no words needing to be said. That was how it was for them. They could go hours without words and still find comfort from each other. Elliot placed his finished cup onto the coffee table and turned to lie down on the couch his head resting on the arm rests. He reached out his arms for Olivia to come lay with him. She smiled softly and put her cup down next to Elliot's and lightly fell onto his chest his arms immediately wrapping themselves around her body. Her black tank top shifted slightly exposing her toned stomach. She smiled as he gently drew lazy patterns across her now exposed stomach.

"You're tickling me." She murmmed into his neck.

"I just want to touch you. I don't think I'll ever get enough of touching you."

He started placing small kisses down the side of her face until he reached her lips. He brushed his lips softly over hers moving his head back and forward waiting for her to latch onto him. Olivia raised her head and grabbed hold of his lips with her own as they brushed over hers once again. She put her hand behind Elliot's head pulling him in. She opened her mouth wide as she let her guest in without hesitation. Elliot's tongue dulled with her own eliciting a moan of pleasure from Olivia. They pulled away only when air become imperative. Olivia's chest heaved up and down as she tried to steady her breathing. Elliot kept his gaze fixed on Olivia's now desire filled eyes. He still couldn't believe he had his partner lying in his arms lust etched in her beautiful features. He wanted more though, he needed more.

He pushed himself up from his lying position pulling Olivia with him he took her hand as he started toward the bedroom. Olivia wordlessly followed him in haze. She couldn't think straight all her senses were wrapped up in Elliot. She didn't even fully know if she wanted to take things this far so soon but she felt powerless to stop it.

Elliot pushed open her bedroom door and guided her down onto the bed. Olivia's brain was still in a fog as her clothes were slowly being removed from her body. She felt like she was on auto pilot. Her head started to clear of fog and a realization hit her hard. Olivia's heart started pounding. Not from desire but from fear. She was about to do something she had never done before and it was going to be with Elliot. Her partner.

She put her hands on Elliot's now bear chest and stopped him coming in for another kiss.

"Just wait and give me a sec."

Elliot pulled away and noticed the tense look in her beautiful chocolate colored eyes. His own eyes changed to confusion, he was sure she wanted this but the look in her eyes and the reaction now evident in her body told him otherwise.

Olivia could feel the embarrassment stain her checks. She quickly pushed him off of her and grabbed her robe on the nearby chair and her cordless phone. She walked quickly into her bathroom shutting the door and locking it behind her.

Elliot's heart started pounding in his chest. He was sure he had read all the signs right. She had wanted to be with him as much as he wanted her. Elliot started to put his clothes on; he needed to sort this new development out with her. He walked over to the bathroom door and knocked lightly.

"Liv?"

"Yeah, El. I'll be out in a sec, k? I need to make a phone call"

Elliot tried to decipher her tone but was drawing a blank. She sounded fine. Maybe she really did just need to make a phone call. Elliot shook his head, he doubted that. Do you really stop what they were about to start to go make a phone call?

Olivia quickly dialed the number she had grown to know by heart. It was the number that delivered her sanity when she could not see through her madness.

The phone rang and on the third ring her liberator picked up.

"Hello. Casey speaking"

"Oh thank God. I need help."

"Liv what's going on? You sound like you in an empty room. Is everything ok?"

"I have locked myself in my bathroom. I have… I… I need help"

"Is everything alright? Should I call someone?"

Olivia smiled at the concern weaved through her friends words. She was so glad they were friends again.

"No, it's not like that." Olivia started. " Umm… I'm kinda naked and have locked myself in the bathroom to avoid something"

"Your naked and avoiding something? What are you avoiding?"

"Elliot"

Casey let out a loud laugh. She immediately imagined her friend sitting on the side of her bath tub naked and talking to her on the phone and Elliot just beyond the door.

"Casey! It's not funny. I called you for help"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Ok, how can I help you?"

"Ok here goes. Elliot and I started fooling around on my bed and the next thing I know I have no clothes on and we're about to get to the main act and I just froze. Casey I have never done this before, and I'm scared as Hell. Please tell me what to do" Olivia pleaded with her friend down the phone.

"Never done what? Frozen up during sex? Or never had sex? Cause I know you've done that, I've seen the photo remember?"

Olivia listened to see if there was even the slightest tone of anger in her friend's voice at the mention of The Photo. Deciding that there was none she continued on.

"No. I've never made love." Olivia whispered. She felt tears well up in her eyes at her confession, but it was true. Years of sleeping with men and not one was someone she had loved. Sure she had liked some of them, even really liked, but there never has been love. At least not on her behalf.

"Oh. Hey it's not that bad a situation. Listen, it's the same as having sex, you know? All the physical stuff is the same, it's not like there's a whole new routine you need to know, but you will, you know, feel different. It's Elliot. He loves you. You're heart well just feel like it's going to burst with this amazing sensation of being with him."

"I'm just so scared Case. I've never been in love. What if he hurts me? I don't think my heart could take it."

"Elliot would never intentionally hurt you. Liv, he is so in love with you it's crazy. Go and be with him. Everything will work out. Trust me."

"Thanks Case. I'll speak to you later"

"Any time. Oh… and I'm gonna want details"

Olivia laughed out loud

"No. I mean it. Specific ones"

"Bye Casey."

"Bye Liv"

Olivia stood up and looked at herself in the mirror. She stared long and hard at the face looking back at her. She could do this; she will go out there and be with the man she loved. She needed to be with the man she loved, it was like every path in her life she had chosen lead right to this moment. Her moment of truth.

She opened the bathroom door and was surprised not to see Elliot still in her room. She worried that her escape into the bathroom had sent him home as quickly made her way through her apartment in search of him. As she neared the kitchen she could hear the sound of pots and pans being clanged together. She walked into her kitchen and saw him at the counter surrounded by cut up vegetables.

"Hey, whatcha doing?" She said coming up to stand behind him.

Elliot jumped at the sound of her voice. He had been so deep in thought on how to rectify what he believed to be his misinterpretation of what she wanted from him.

"Just making you dinner. Vegetable lasagna. Sound good?" He asked turning to face her. He took in her appearance. She was still in the robe she had put on as she fled the bedroom, her hair was a little flat from laying with him on the bed, but to him she looked like the most beautiful woman in the world. He wanted so bad to reach out and pull her into him but was confused as to what she really wanted.

Olivia could feel his apprehension. She sighed in annoyance at what she had caused. She never wanted him to feel self-conscious around her. Olivia knew she was the only one of the two who could make it right. She stepped in close to him forcing him back up against the counter top and only stopped when her body was flush up against his.

"I'm not hungry El" She whispered running her hands up his chest and around his neck.

She saw in his eyes for a brief moment a look of confusion though that was quickly replaced by hunger of another kind as she started nibbling on the soft skin under his jaw bone. He gripped her hips and moaned as she kissed and nibbled her way down his neck. His hips thrust into hers letting her know what he wanted. Olivia smiled into his neck feeling the effect she was having on him pressing into her belly.

"Liv. I don't know what's going on. Are you sure you want this? We can wait. I'm happy to wait. Well not happy to, but I will for you" He said huskily into her hair.

Olivia looked up and him and smirked. "You not piking out on me, are you Stabler?"

Elliot looked into her eyes and saw a look of confidence that had not previously been there. "No Benson. Just making sure we're playing the same game"

"Good"

Elliot leaned into capture her lips prying her mouth open with his tongue groaning in satisfaction as her tongue came out to play with his own. She nipped at his lower lip and soothed it with her tongue. Elliot pulled her body in close so she could feel the effect she was having on him. Olivia's body took over as she started to grind her hips into his. She needed more of him. She ran her hand down his chest and over her jean covered crotch giving it a light squeeze. Elliot jumped at the contact of her hand on his pulsating penis. Olivia smiled into the kiss knowing she had the control to make her partner jump at her touches.

"Bedroom. Now" She demanded not taking her mouth away from his. Elliot scooped her up into his arms and carried her all the way there never letting his lips part from hers.

He laid her down gently and stood back up to discard his clothes for the second time within an hour. Once he was naked he slid his body over Olivia's settling between the crook of her legs and coming face to face with her. Olivia's heart pounded in her chest as she felt him rest gently against her centre waiting for acquiescence for entrance. Her breath hitched as he moved his hips against hers as he let the head of his penis slip in gently. He waited for her eyes to meet with his before he went any further; needing that final okay from her. She looked at him and bit her bottom lip nervously. Elliot looked at her in all her nervousness and was about pull out what little of him that was placed within side of her when she stilled him with her hands firmly on his arse.

"Don't leave. Stay there. I'm ok" She whispered. She could feel the tears trying to escape from her eyes. She willed them to stay at bay. Elliot's heart clenched at the sight of her tears moistening her eyes.

"Livia, we don't have to."

She looked into his eyes and felt a rush of love flood her body. She could do this, she wanted to do this. She brought one hand up and stroked his cheek a small smile graced her lips.

"Please don't hurt me El." She begged softly.

Her request startled Elliot. He knew she was not talking about hurting her physically with their love making. She was scared he would wound her heart.

"Liv, I would never hurt you. I don't even exist without you."

She stroked her thumb over his lips smiling at his declaration. That's all she needed to hear. He needed her as much as she needed him, their two souls only existing through the life of the other. This would be the only man she would ever make love to. It didn't matter what men had been in her pass. She could make a future with him right now. She was going to give him something she had never given anyone before. Her future. He would be her destiny maker.

"Make love to me El."

The truth had been told

A/N" I tried to do a full on smut scene, but I just couldn't. I want to so bad though. Another story maybe.

Please review.

Cheers!!


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